THROUGH THE LENS
Unique observations and ideas for a FABULOUS wedding
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Your Wedding Photography "Must Have's"
There are numerous versions of the list available these days, but most likely your photographer will have one of his own, derived from his or her years of experience with many couples. Usually the list offers dozens of standard shots, some posed, some candid, that could be expected at any typical wedding, plus perhaps some special ones the photographer has perfected as part of his own particular "style". There should also be plenty of space for you to write in ideas of your own. The bride and groom fill out the list, sometimes with help from family and friends, then send it to the photographer, who will probably get in touch prior to the wedding, to discuss it. That's when he'll offer valuable insights on how you'll accomplish your photographic goals on your special day.
Beyond that, the list is so much more than a hard-copy rundown your photographer will use. For one thing, it's the starting point as he plans out the "flow" of your day. Most professional photographers prefer to head into a wedding with a certain amount of preparation. Flying by the seat of one's pants is not the best strategy on what many people consider to be the most important day of their lives! Photography pros will spend time familiarizing themselves with the names of important people, the physical surroundings, the expected lighting and the time line for the day's events, among other things, and a shot list helps the photographer clearly understand the bride and groom's expectations. 
One of the biggest challenges a wedding photographer faces is time limits. There can be a great deal of pressure to get the ceremony started on time and to keep the reception going as planned. Limo schedules, food service and last call at the open bar are just a few of the many considerations that can influence the photography schedule. That's why the shot list should convey which images are of crucial importance, which aren't required at all and which ones lie somewhere in between. A professional photographer prioritizes shots within the available time frames, adapts to schedule changes and works to captures as many of the requested images as possible. Although having an official shot list is certainly not a requirement -- and some photographers don't like to use one at all -- the big advantage is, it leaves little room for misunderstanding, when it comes to your photography priorities.
est Man showing the Groom the time on his watch. But by no means should you feel you must incorporate every pose suggestion into your own wedding! Your photographer will be happy to answer any questions you have about specific items on the checklist--and offer you an estimate as to how long your particular selections might take to accomplish. Keep in mind, the more poses you select as top priorities, the more time you can expect to dedicate to the camera on your wedding day. One last word of advice for brides and grooms who expect to place a heavy emphasis on a photojournalistic approach to their wedding photography: you might not want to reject the thought of a shot list entirely. Take some time to look through it. You'll find many of the items on the list are the candid shots you won't want your photographer to miss. Don't pass up an opportunity to communicate that! Something else you might want to take into consideration is your families: what images will they want as keepsakes from your wedding? Mothers and
grandparents often want a traditional shot of the two of you at the altar and various posed group shots where everyone is smiling and looking at the camera at the same time. That's especially true when your guests include many relatives who've traveled long distances. A strictly photojournalistic approach may prevent those images from being captured--and you may have some unhappy relatives to deal with, after it's too late to fix it!!! My advice? Look at suggested poses on the wedding photography shot list; ask important family members for their input. You might find the time you spend filling out the list to be more than worth the effort.
For more wedding images, including fabulous photojournalistic shots, I invite you to visit my web page: http://www.dougforner.com
Details, Details
les can spend so many hours planning every last detail--then not be able to remember much of anything afterward! That's one reason everyone says wedding photography is so important--to help couples and their families remember those fleeting moments. Here's where having an experienced wedding photographer can really pay off. You need someone who knows how to document the activities and the emotions--and the details. A wedding day "shot list" is a great starting point--but an experienced photo
grapher goes way beyond the standard poses and traditional candids, keeping an eye out for the special details the two of you spent so much time agonizing over. 
was to look through her pictures and see the many special touches she didn't get to check on herself, that day. "My niece had spent an hour setting out the framed escort cards I assembled the week before the wedding. They were on the table at the entrance to our reception hall," she explained in her thank you note. "By the time I got into the room the table was empty!!! So I wanted to thank you for stopping there with your camera. My niece was thrilled when I told her how perfect the frames looked." 
Brides don't really understand how little they'll remember from their wedding day, according to DeLaney McDaniel, with DeTails
by DeLaney. "Before the wedding, we'll spend hours talking about the napkins and the programs and how the buffet tables should be laid out," she says. "Then come the tears when the bride realizes she doesn't have any pictures showing the results of her efforts." McDaniel suggests clients keep a short list of the most important details, to help your photographer know what to look for. "You can't make the list TOO long," she laughs, "but a photographer who's worth his salt knows how important the little things are, to the 'big picture'." On a more practical note, McDaniel points out that detail shots are really important to the design of today's modern-style wedding books
. "There's just something special about seeing all of your wedding pictures laid out on the pages, with enlarged images of the details serving as the backgrounds." She lists close-ups of the flowers, table settings and pew bo
ws among her favorite shots. And for book pages showing the bride and groom before the wedding, she likes to see images of cufflinks, bouquets and the bride's "up do" as backgrounds. "It's always so pretty as part of the album design. And there's the added bonus of having a permanent reminder of how much effort went into planning the perfect wedding day!" 
Here's just a sampling of the detail shots your photographer might be looking for: the buttons or bow on the back of your gown, along with any embellishments; the flower girl's basket, th
e ties your groom and his groomsmen are wearing, your rings in their box, the gift card on the flowers in your "getting ready room", the petals on the lawn at your ceremony site, the monogram on your custom-made runner, the harpist's hands on the strings, the roses you set out on your mothers seats, the champagne fountain, the chandelier in your reception hall, your guestbook, the beverage table, the attendants' flowers lying at their places at the head table, the pile of shoes at the side of the dance floor, etc.
While you might never forget the face of your groom, standing at the altar on your wedding day, you'll always be glad your photographer thought to capture images of the precious--and easily missed--details!NEXT BLOG: In discussing the importance of detail shots, we briefly touched on the subject of the standard weddi
ng "shot list," which includes the many poses and candid moments you would expect to see at most weddings. If you haven't already reviewed such a list, you might be surprised at how extensive it can be. And the good news is, you can always add a few suggestions of your own. To see more beautiful wedding images right now, visit my website http://www.dougforner.com
The Green Wedding Photographer
Back in the spring, we blogged about the "green" wedding trend and talked about how engaged couples are incorporating their concern for the environment into their wedding. Today, a little "common sense" discussion about how a wedding photographer can do the same. I use the phrase "common sense" because much of what wedding vendors are doing in relation to the "green" trend is based on just that, common sense.
Personally, I have to say it's been fairly easy to address waste issues like packaging and paper products. Photographers have al
ways had many choices when it comes to how they deliver products to their clients, including boxes and bags made from all kinds of materials and delivery methods that focused more on cost, speed or convenience rather than the environment. Now there are simple "greener" choices that can be made--for example, using ground shipping over air, and paper bags made from recycled materials, rather than plastic bags. Plus, the digital revolution in general has made addressing paper and ink usage a "no brainer", since so many couples are opting to go "proof-less" by receiving their wedding images via the Internet or on disk. Even rethinking the business-side of our operation (billing, contracts, correspondance, etc) to be as "paper-less" as possible has become an effective way for us to reduce our impact on the environment. Also, there are the aesthetic issues--print papers, albums, mats, frames and other display products and methods. Traditional "prints" are on a type of paper that doesn't decompose--ultimately taking up more room in the landfill. Fortunately there are beautiful paper options that are fiber-based--such as cotton. Some types of papers are now being made with forest-preservation in mind, and they're labeled appropriately. Album companies are offering more eco-friendly books, including those using recycled or sustainable components. When it comes to framing, we're beginning to see some manufacturers offering products that are better for the environment, especially those offering wood cut with sustainability in mind, For truly committed "green" photographers, there's the option of making their own framing products, using environmentally-responsible materials.
Then there are the more complicated issues, such as inks, printing processes, disposal and equipment procurement and maintenance. Photographers can be more conscientious about rushing out to buy every new piece of equipment that comes along, and also about how they choose to dispose of their old gear. In between those extremes are the many ways photographers can help "reduce, recycle and re-use" equipment. Also, for those of us who still use photographic labs, most of these companies are more than happy to offer assurances that they abide by all environmental requirements. Many will even outline how they may go above and beyond the basics. On the other hand, many photographers are choosing to print their own images using ink jet printers, which offer several environmental advantages. For press-production, photographers have their choice of manufacturers that offer digital presses rather than offset presses.
There are other environmental concerns, however, that we photographers can't so easily overcome. For example, many newlyweds want their images on CDs and DVDs, which are frowned on by environmentalists. Here again, we can use a common sense approach and choose to lessen the impact by at least incorporating "greener" packaging when our clients request images on disks. Finally, one item of particular note for you, the engaged couple, as "customers" planning your wedding: some photographers are using environmentalism as a marketing tool, for better or worse, to borrow a familiar wedding day phrase! Many of them are using the "green" moniker simply as a way to set themselves apart from other photographers, in an increasingly competitive market. There's nothing unusual about that strategy! And in this case, it's probably not a bad thing. Other wedding photographers, though, are stressing their concern for the environment as a way to attract a "higher end" clientele--believing those who search out eco-friendly vendors are better educated and more discerning, therefore willing to spend more money (sometimes a lot more) on wedding products and services.
In the end, I think the best "green" approach for photographers, especially right now when technology is changing so fast it's hard to keep tabs on it, has to continue to be common sense. Today's wedding photographers are fairly well versed on the latest trends in their industry and shouldn't hesitate to answer any questions engaged couples have, regarding environmental impact.
For some great sample wedding images, check out my website: http://www.dougforner.com
Doug
Grooms, Listen Up!
Guys, it might seem like the wedding is "all about the bride" but I'm here to tell ya, there's an awful lot riding on YOU, too! In this blog, I'd like to offer a collection of tips and suggestions from one guy to another--they might just make your day go a little more smoothly.When it comes to the wedding plans, a lot of today's grooms are asserting their preferences from the very start. One of the biggest questions is, what will I be wearing? The better question may be, what do you WANT to wear? To get the conversation going, your fiance might be thrilled if you ask her to show you the wedding fashion pictures she's been saving -- or if you're the first one to suggest a visit to the formal wear shop. One thing's for sure though, if choosing what you'll be wearing on your big day is important to you, let her know as soon as possible.
Trust me on this--you're gonna look GREAT on your wedding day! You'll feel great, too, if you have a say so when it comes to style. For example, you may think every groom has to wear a tux--but that isn't necessarily so. Military uniforms are also acceptable. Suits are too, in all but the most formal settings. As a rule of thumb, the darker the suit, the more formal it is. Many of the grooms I see in suits these days choose the popular light tan color, which looks great at an outdoor wedding, for example. Even very casual clothing (ie, loose-fitting cotton shirts, no jackets, etc.) is becoming more popular for casual ceremony settings, like the beach or pool side. It can look great and COST a lot less--but here's the key: the decision needs to be mutual. If you don't already know it, your bride will have definite opinions about where your wedding should take place and more importantly, what she intends to wear (a casual groom doesn't go well with a very formal bride!). Still, if casual clothing is of interest to you, you shouldn't hesitate to speak up, while the planning is in the early stages. You can also have a say so in how you'll be set apart from your groomsmen. The old stand-by is the boutonnieres -- and if you don't speak up, that might be how it'll go for you. You get a red rose, for example, while the rest of the guys get whatever color rose goes best with the wedding theme. But why not take it a step further? If your wedding will be fairly formal, why not try on a tux
with tails--then your groomsmen can wear the matching tail-less version. Or you could set yourself apart with a different color tie or cummerbund. Have a little fun with it--I know of one groom who wore a tie and cummerbund printed with the FSU Seminoles logo (with the approval of his bride, a University of Florida alum!) Some
free-wheeling grooms even set themselves apart by wearing a hat. Are
you brave enough to wear a top hat? Are you more of a cowboy hat kind
of guy? One thing I know a lot of grooms dread about their wedding is the prospect of being in a restrictive jacket all day. But don't worry-- you'll be able to take it off in time for most of the fun. You can count on on wearing your jacket through the first dance and the toast. If there's a formal dance with you mother, you'll pr
obably want to have it on for that as well. After that, comfort becomes a top priority and no one will blame you for ditching that jacket! A couple of other important pieces of advice from your photographer, the most important of which is: be on time for pictures! Although I've found today's grooms are more knowledgable about cameras and photography in general, I still find many of them aren't so interested in the wedding day picture process. Sadly, grooms and their groomsmen are often late for pictures or miss them altogether. That's a big mistake on a day that is often timed down to the minute. That's why I encourage engaged couples to be well-prepared by going over the details with their photographer (and coordinator, if they have one) ahead of time. For example, the groom, his attendants and his family are often the first subjects of the pre-ceremony portrait session. If that doesn't come off as scheduled, the timing of the rest of the day can be derailed. You can do yourself (and your bride) a favor by knowing the plan and making sure you -- and everyone who will be photographed with you -- is on time, and at the spot chosen for pictures. You can also make it a point to be informed as t
o when and where the corsages and boutonnieres will be delivered, so everyone you're responsible for has their flowers on. One thing I've noticed lately is a trend toward more grooms-to-be making the initial contact with prospective wedding photographers. Sometimes it's their interest in photography, sometimes it's because many brides "assign" the technical wedding planning issues to their grooms. But most often, I think, it's because a lot of couples are splitting the planning duties and the guys are simply more likely to be the ones who make some of the initial calls. I've also found that more grooms-to-be are attending the portfolio viewing. I think these are both positive trends and I've enjoyed meeting and getting to know more grooms beforehand. It's always good to have established great rapport with both the bride and groom on "the big day"!
For more great wedding images and ideas, check out my website http://www.dougforner.com
The Tricky Toast
It's only on a very rare occasion that a bride tells me there won't be a toast at her wedding reception. Even if there's no champagne to be served, at most weddings, someone has been asked to deliver some sort of congratulatory message to the newlyweds. While no two toasts are exactly alike, as a professional photographer, I fully understand there's no toast more important than the one I'm photographing today! The trick is to be as prepared as possible -- and then be ready for anything.
To be prepared, details about the toast are something I make sure to discuss with a bride in advance of the wedding. In many cases I've already photographed receptions in that particular location, so I'm
familiar with the physical set-up. There are always basic considerations like
the size of a room, available light, and the proximity of the newlyweds to
their guests. There's also the question of the person or people who
will be toasting the couple, their relationships to the bride and
groom, and where they will be physically located while giving the
toast. A lot of the time I also go over these details with the DJ or
Master of Ceremonies. It's very important that everyone is on the
same page.
Some toasts are short, some are long. Some are dramatic, some are
sentimental, others are humorous. Some bring tears, some bring
laughter. One thing's for sure, the wedding toast should never be routine for a professional photographer--the element of surprise is always
something to be watching for. In that regard, we play the part of
photojournalists, capturing the expressions, the reactions, the emotion
of the occasion. But I've found that many couples also want a posed
shot of the toast--usually of the two of them looking at the camera as
their glasses "clink". 
When it comes to planning the toast, I have several pieces of advice I'd like to share -- based on my experience at the many wedding receptions I've photographed: Consider stressing to the catering manager the importance of having the guests' champagne glasses filled in time for the toast. It's surprising to me that so many times when the DJ is ready to announce the toast, the servers haven't even begun to pour the bubbly. Most couples are toasted immediately or very soon after the first dance, so during the first dance is the perfect time for the wait staff to be going from table to table filling glasses. It might be a good idea to have your coordinator or someone from the wedding party ready to remind the catering manager when the champagne should be poured. And the DJ could be clued in, too.
Also, many toast-givers get a heads up about where they should stand while making their remarks, but the "heads up" doesn't always come from the photographer. I would like to suggest that some thought be given to how placement of the toast-giver will affect the pictures. I prefer to see the bride, the groom and the toast-giver(s) placed in a straight line, all facing forward. When the toast-giver stands behind the newlyweds, the back of the bride and/or groom's heads are what we end up seeing in the toast pictures. Sometimes It's unavoidable. The toast could be staged later, if that were to happen--but many photojournalists wouldn't even sug
gest such a solution. One good idea could be to have the DJ or MC waiting with the microphone at the spot where the toast giver should stand. Although it's not the most difficult wedding activity to capture with a camera, the toast to the newlyweds is one of the most important -- and unpredictable -- events at the reception. The experienced wedding photographer understands that no matter how many toasts will be given or by whom, the number one concern is documenting the emotions.
For more wedding ideas and images, visit my website http://www.dougforner.com
It's a Nice Day for a GREEN Wedding
We've just celebrated another Earth Day, an event dedicated to raising public awareness about environmental issues, problems and solutions. It seems like an appropriate time to consider what the wedding industry is doing to become more "earth friendly".
There was a time when an "eco-friendly wedding" pretty much amounted to tossing birdseed, rather than rice. Today, it's one of the most talked-about wedding trends, with dozens of ways for engaged couples to incorporate their concern for the environment into their big day. Some of the possibilities are fairly obvious, while others are less common. Some are easy and relatively inexpensive while others require a bit more planning and additional costs. In fact, I've heard it estimated that couples who are seriously planning a green wedding should expect to pay one-third to one-half more.
If you're looking for some basic, cost-effective ideas, you can start with the locations of your ceremony and reception. You can reduce the amount of fuel required for your wedding simply by choosing the most central location possible, and holding both events at the 
same location,or at locations that are as close together as possible. In fact, the location itself can be chosen to make an environmental
statement--consider holding your wedding in an outdoor setting such as
a park, the beach or a garden location. Let your guests know the
environmental significance of the site with a special notation in your program, on
your Save the Date notice or even in your Thank You card.
If you're planning to marry and celebrate indoors, you can still show your concern for the environment by making arrangements to use the least amount of electricity possible. For example, you can have a daytime event, keeping light use at a minimum. Also, you shouldn't hesitate to check with each venue you're considering, to find out what they're doing to be environmentally responsible.
You can also consider your attire. Perhaps you could wear a recycled dress. Sure, it might not be as glamorous as a fresh-from-the-runway wedding gown, but wearing your mother's dress, or a rental, or one purchased from a consignment shop is more earth-friendly. There's also the option of the Brides Against Breast Cancer organization (bridesagainstbreastcancer.org), which allows you to purchase a "gently-used" dress and help a worthwhile cause at the same time. Even if you go ahead and decide to buy a gown, you can allow it to be recycled by someone else, by taking it to a consignment shop or donating it to a charity, after the wedding.
Flowers are another area where you can reasonably lessen your impact on the environment. Try minimizing the use of fresh flowers when possible. Dried and silk items are an option for bouquets
and floral arrangements. Your florist can offer ideas for using glass, stone, shells and other natural products, as substitutes. In the example at right, dried twigs and moss were used to construct interesting altar arrangements. Not only did this idea minimize the amount of waste at the ceremony site, but the arrangements were pretty enough for the newlyweds to "recycle" into their new home's decor! On the other hand, if you do decide on fresh flowers, think about donating your floral arrangements after the event. Designate one person to distribute them to nearby hospitals and nursing homes, where the blooms can be furthered enjoyed by others for days to come.
Probably the most obvious example of waste at a wedding is all of the uneaten food. Ask your wedding coordinator or caterer about arranging to donate some of it, after the reception is over. Unfortunately, not everything can be donated. Food that's already been served to the guests is generally off-limits to charities. But beyond that, each organization has its own guidelines for accepting reception donations and it's well-worth checking into. Another earth-friendly option that's gaining popularity at receptions is avoiding
bottled water and canned or bottled drinks, by asking the caterer to serve beverages
from pitchers instead. 
Other "green" solutions may not be so convenient or inexpensive, but are still worth considering. For example, many brides and grooms make a point to use as much recycled materials as possible, when ordering invitations, programs, wedding stationary and other paper products. Your coordinator and caterer may have other useful ideas about how
to incorporate recycled items. Even the wedding album you choose
can make a difference. For example, the White Glove company
(wgbooks.com) offers "Eco-Friendly Wedding Books" that use recycled
materials, as well as environmentallysafer inks, glues and production
methods.
Couples who favor an organic lifestyle are finding more opportunities to plan their weddings accordingly. Check with your caterer and cake maker for ideas. Also, wedding gowns are being
made available in styles that use organic fabrics and vegetable dyes. Even your florist can offer ideas for incorporating organics. You can also inquire about using locally-grown and in-season
items, to minimize the amount of transportation fuel required to provide flowers for your bouquets and arrangements.
Another popular idea is to make a charitable contribution as part of your wedding. One bride and groom I know took the fairly-large budget they'd set aside for favors and made a contribution to a well-known environmental charity, instead. A simple card at each place setting at the reception thanked their guests for sharing their special day and informed them of the donation that was made in honor of their attendance. Another couple showed their love of animals by making a contribution to a wildlife organization. Then, instead of ordering pricey favors, the bride and groom spent several Saturday afternoons before the wedding, making adorable little clay animal that acted as place markers and also informed each guest of their donation. They felt good about their contribution and about personalizing their special day!
While doing research for this blog, I discovered there are entire companies whose specialty is helping you minimize the environmental impact of you wedding. They'll come after the event to gather up anything and everything that is recyclable and distribute it accordingly. It certainly is a convenient choice! However, their services are not free of charge, so be prepared for the added expense. Still, it's possible the cost of much of what is reclaimed can be used as a tax write off, because it may be considered a charitable donation. Consult with your wedding coordinator and tax adviser for information on this option.
And finally, there are many, MANY green trends in the photography industry, to help you plan your wedding coverage and choose your portrait and/or album products. So many, in fact, that I'll reserve a future blog to share some of the
best examples.
Basically, if you keep the "Three R's" in mind: reduce, recycle and reuse, when looking for ways to incorporate eco-friendly ideas into your wedding, you'll not only have a positive impact on "Mother Earth" but you'll be making a statement and personalizing your wedding at the same time. Whatever you decide to do, be sure to let your photographer know the visual environmental touches you've incorporated into your day, so you'll always have the photographs to remind you about the difference you were able to make!
NEXT BLOG: No wedding would be complete without a toast. No wedding album would be complete without images of the special friends and family members who gave the toast. What could be easier than capturing that important tradition? It's not always as simple as it looks!
Visit http://www.dougforner.com for more beautiful images and wedding planning ideas.
Wedding Photojournalism: One Photographer's Thoughts
Ask 100 different wedding photographers what Wedding Photojournalism is -- and you'd probably get 100 different answers. "Documenting wedding 'moments' as they naturally happen". "Story-telling". "Non-obtrusive". "Candid". "Capturing the emotion of the day, without trying to create it". "No staging allowed". I've heard all of these descriptions, and many more, to define the photojournalistic approach to wedding coverage. I've even heard some c
ynics declare
photojournalism is the "easier" photographic style, since the
photographer doesn't have to do much advance planning...or set up any
formal poses...or fret when important people aren't in place for
pictures. He or she just captures the activity "as it happens", come what may. Most of these definitions may be useful in trying to describe a trend that continues to be a buzzword in the wedding world.
But I believe engaged couples need to be careful about what their expectations are in regard to photojournalism, as they plan a very important day in their lives. While there are some photographers who define themselves strictly according to a particular style--whether it be photojournalism, fashion, fine art or any of a number of specialties, most of today's wedding photographers will tell you they provide a mixture of candid images and posed portraits. That's because so many engaged couples com
e to the realization that even if they personally favor a photojournalistic approach, there are still family members and friends who expect to order more familiar formal poses, in which everyone is "smiling for the camera". Before making up your mind about your preferences, I suggest the two of you look at a standard wedding photography checklist. Consider the suggested images. How many of them are posed? How many are candid? Which ones do you want in your set of images? Which ones are you NOT interested in? Are there images you know you'll want, that aren't on the list? You mig
ht be surprised to find out how many of your must-have shots would never "just happen"! Once you're more sure of what your expectations are, you'll
It may be true that many of the most dedicated wedding "photojournalists" come from other photojournalism fields, namely newspapers, television or magazines. They really know how to "capture the action". They honed their photography skills while thinking on their feet--a definite advantage when making the move to the unpredictable world of wedding photography.
Don't be led to believe, however, that it can't be photojournalism if it isn't black and white. If you want to see color shots from your wedding photojournalist, I advise you to discuss it with him or her, well in advance.
There's a certain amount of documentary thought that goes into wedding photojournalism, too. It is about the action shots (above right), the "big" moments and the small ones, too. But it's also about observing the details. Anything that might go unnoticed by the bride and groom--a tender look between the bride's parents durin
g the first dance, a ring bearer smiling at Gramma in the audience, a tissue clutched by an emotional soloist (left). An experienced professional photographer will also think to capture how the pew bows looked, to document the ribbons in the flower girl's "up-do", to record the table placement of the favors the bride spent so many hours hunting online. The newlyweds would never be able to witness all of these details on the wedding day--much less remember them all. A good wedding photojournalist will make sure they see these things, after the wedding!
NEXT BLOG: Have you seen the new TV commercial for a particular brand of sugar that touts itself as being environmentally friendly? I can't remember the last time I saw a commercial for any brand of sugar at all--let alone one that stresses how "green" the sugar is, rather than how sweet or how pure. Which got me wondering: just how committed is the wedding industry to being "kind to the earth"? You might be surprised to hear some of the things I found out. In the meantime, check out some of the great wedding images and ideas posted on my website http://www.dougforner.com
Tin Cans, Sword Hands and Wedding Plans
From the white dress to the cans dangling from the back bumper, you don't have to be a professional wedding planner to be aware there are countless traditions, rituals and superstitions that dictate wedding-day activities. As an experienced wedding photographer, I've seen (and chuckled over) more of these oddities than I could begin to mention. And yet many of the traditions and superstitions documented in today's wedding photographs go without any special notice. I'd like to highlight a few of them in today's blog:
Just about everyone knows it's considered bad luck for the bride to see the
groom before she comes down the aisle, but did you know that today's most popular day for weddings -- Saturday -- was once considered among the least lucky days to get married? Apparently at one time, Wednesday was considered the very best day to get married. Today, of course, Saturday is the day most everyone has off work, so I guess with modern brides, practicality wins out over superstition.
Have you ever wondered why the groom traditionally stands on the bride's right side? The custom began long ago when grooms sometimes needed to have their sword hands ready to fight off their brides' other suitors!
The symbolism and superstitions surrounding the wedding dress alone are
enough to fill a 
book. Maybe you've been told it would be bad luck to make your own dress. That would be the case, even if you sew for a living! Very superstitious brides know you shouldn't try on your finished dress before the wedding. Then, when you do finally put it on, superstition dictates that you don't look at yourself in the mirror before you walk down the aisle. And, whatever you do, don't rip your dress once it's on--superstition has it that a ripped wedding dress foretells a disastrous end to the marriage.
As for the tradition of the pure white bridal gown, I almost hesitate to point out, for fear of offending mothers and
mothers-in-law alike, that the color has
less to do with symbolizing purity than it does demonstrating wealth. The woman
who started the white dress craze was afterall, none other than Queen Victoria. Historians note that
since at that time only wealthy people could afford clothing made of white fabric, the white
wedding dress quickly became the "in" way to show off. Not to mention the fact the white wedding dress was meant to be worn only once--a luxury not many working class brides could afford. In times gone by, some smart brides would buy a simple white dress for the wedding, then later dye it to a darker, more practical color.
When it comes to planning the rest of the wedding-day attire, what guidance could be more familiar to a bride-to-be than the time-honored poem "Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue"? Lately the traditional "blue" has often been represented by a lacy blue garter, tucked safely out of sight until the groom removes it at the reception. I've been surprised to learn that for years, many people considered the luckiest "borrowed" item to be a veil, especially if it was borrowed from a happily married woman, say the bride's mother or grandmother (below). Ideally, it would have been borrowed from a woman with many children, assuming the newlyweds wanted a big family.
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For the very superstitious, the veil is still the one thing the bride MOST want
s
to avoid trying on before the wedding. If you must see what it looks like on, and you don't want to take any chances, ask someone else to model it for you. And since we're
on the
subject of the bridal veil, you may have wondered about the original
reason for the custom. I'm told early brides believe
d they should keep their faces covered, to fool any evil spirits that might be lurking nearby.
Speaking of evil spirits, you can trace the custom of tying cans to the going-away vehicle back to superstition. Some newlyweds of "yesteryear" thought the clanking noises on the road would scare any demons away!
Much of the symbolism and tradition of the wedding event involves the issue
of fertility. Back in "the day", couples were considered especially blessed if they had a
house full of children--which explains the popularity of marriage ceremony customs like guests tossing rice and flower girl dropping rose petals as she precedes the bride down the aisle. If you don't have 
a flower girl, you can still give a nod to the tradition, by rolling out the aisle runner and scattering petals along the edges before the guests arrive.
Many other wedding traditions are linked to the symbolism of marital unity and
fidelity--one of the more familiar is the unity candle. The same is true of the wedding rings, since the officiant rarely misses an
opportunity to point out how the circular shape and the enduring nature of the gold symbolize both the eternity and purity
of the marriage commitment. But less familiar is the superstition that governs a dropped ring. Whichever one of you 
fumbles the ring during the ceremony, well, it doesn't bode well for you. And if the ring should roll away from the altar, your life will be shortened even more. So, you'd better hang on to that ring!
Another interesting belief is that weddings are doomed if they're held when the minute hand of the clock is on its way down. So a very superstitious bride might make sure the ceremony starts at, say, 1030 or 445, when the minute hand is on its way back up.
There are many other incidental customs and superstitions governing different aspects of weddings and marriage. One of my personal favorites is a little known tradition I learned quite by
accident. While waiting for guests to start down a receiving line, I
witnessed a bride and her maid of honor with their heads together and whispering, The bride sneaked her
friend a dollar bill and received a safety pin in return. Later, I had to ask
what the exchange was all about and with a giggle, the bride confessed she was honoring the superstition that the household finances would be controlled by whichever newlywed became the first to make a purchase after saying "I do" (I immediately became
convinced my own wife had engaged in such a transaction on OUR wedding day!)
I'd like to know of any strange wedding rituals and superstitions you may have encountered in your wedding planning. Maybe you even have one or two you intend to incorporate in your own wedding. Take a minute to comment with your stories and ideas--I'll include them when I blog about customs and traditions again, soon!
Next blog: My answer to the reader's question about wedding photojournalism. How do you make the right decision on the type of photography you want for your wedding? And in the meantime, check out wedding images and photography ideas on my website http://www.dougforner.com
Grains of Sand: the New Unity Ceremony
Sometimes called the Wedding Sand Ceremony or the Unity Sand Ceremony, the purpose is the same as the Unity Candle. The bride and groom each have a special vase or vial, from which they pour sand into a larger see-through container. During the ceremony, the officiant talks about how the pouring of the sand symbolizes the unifying of two people joined in marriage, the individual grains intermingling to become one new inseparable body of sand. Afterward, the newlyweds get to take home a special keepsake--the vase filled with the sand they poured on their wedding day becomes a beautiful and sentimental center of attention in their new home's decor.
The history of the Sand Ceremony seems to be tied to the West Coast--California or Hawaii. It may have first been used as a way to s
olve the wind-blown candle problem during a beach wedding. Apparently the procedure initially involved simple beach sand but quickly evolved to include brightly colored sands that are now easily found at many wedding supply companies, along with the special containers for pouring. The containers come in all shapes and sizes, some are the nesting variety (at right), some are shaped like hearts and some come complete with a stand for dispIaying the container.
I'm told the Sand Ceremony trend really caught on after one of the couples who met on TV's "The "Bachelorette" incorporated one in their wedding. Interestingly enough, the Sand Ceremony has become extremely popular at weddings that involve blended families. It's an ideal way to include the bride and groom's children, whether they're youngsters or grown adults. Unless the vase has a large enough mouth to allow everyone to pour at once, the participants take a turn pouring their sand--usually starting and ending with the bride and groom. When each person has a unique color of sand to contribute, the end result can be quite intricate and pretty.
In most of the Sand ceremonies I've photographed, the event only takes two or three minutes and it usually happens right after the vows. Sometimes, though, the bride and groom say their vows while they're pouring the sand--w
hich certainly takes a bit more concentration! Since I've never seen a "spill" during a Sand Ceremony, I have to think many couples are practicing their pouring skills ahead of time. I think that would be especially important if children are involved, or if more than one person will be pouring sand at the same time. To help out, some wedding
supply companies offer Sand Ceremony funnels--which can be as simple as
a rolled piece of paper. I've seen them in the wedding colors, as you might expect, and
embellished with the couple's monogram. 
Some people don't believe the Sand Ceremony has a place in a religious wedding ceremony, but I haven't found that to be true. Some ministers have a special prayer they use for the occasion and some even "bless" the sand. Also, some couples include a spiritual aspect by starting with a container that already has a base layer of white sand, to symbolize God or Christ. Then as they pour in their own colored sand, the bride and groom acknowledge their union is built on a spiritual foundation. The minister may be asked to "top off" the container with a final layer of white sand.
Available sand colors range from subtle to bold and can reflect everything from the wedding colors, to the bride and groom's personal favorites, to the color scheme of their home. If you want your guests to know the significance of the colors, the minister can offer an explanation during the ceremony, or the bride and groom can make mention of it during their vows. Whether you're getting married indoor or out, the pouring of sand can be the highlight of your wedding ceremony, even more so if you think of creative ways to personalize it and make it special.
Are you getting married? Looking for a great wedding photographer? Now through the end of March, you can take advantage of a fantastic deal--Doug Forner Photography's "Spring Half Price Offer". Book by March 31 and get half off our wedding photography service, which includes "no time limits" coverage, web posting and the copyright on all of your images! Go go http://www.dougforner.com and scroll down to "Spring Half Price Offer" for details. Hurry, the last day to book us at half price is March 31st!
When to Do the Pictures?
A good solution has been made available in recent years, by photographers who offer to do all of the posed "altar returns" before the ceremony. I say "recently," because many of today's engaged couples aren't so concerned about abiding by tradition or superstition -- including the one that holds it is bad luck for the groom to lay eyes on the bride before she walks down the aisle.
Personally, I have never pressured an engaged couple to agree to doing the formal portrait session before the ceremony. However, I'm willing to scheduled one, if that is what the bride and groom are committed to doing. In some cases, the idea comes from the bride herself, especially now that it's become a more acceptable trend. In other cases, when timing seems to be of critical importance, I've suggested it. If it turns out to be acceptable to the bride-and-groom-to-be, I'm more than happy to do it!
After those initial candid
photographs, we begin capturing the bride-and-groom-only poses. Then at some point, the wedding party and family members enter the room to join in the session. The end result is, when the wedding ceremony is over and you and the
groom walk back down the aisle, you're free to move on to a receiving line (if you're planning one) or directly to the reception and the celebration with your guests. Granted, this idea often doesn't go over well with mothers and other members of the family who hold to tradition. If that's the case, the bride and groom must decide which is more important--convenient timing or not offending important people in their lives.
Finally, there are a couple of other important considerations I feel I should mention, if this is a decision you find yourself facing.
Some engaged couples believe they can address the issue of getting to the reception quickly by eliminating the posed portrait session altogether. While many photographers would be happy to oblige, I think you should serious thought to whether this is really what you want. Today you might believe all you want is photojournalistic images -- but someday you'll look bac
k and wonder why you didn't have any simple straight-forward portraits done, especially one or two of you and the groom. Plus, consider family members who may not be so convinced of the photojournalistic-style. Most likely they will want a portrait of the bride and groom with everyone who is important to them (especially Grandma and Grandpa). At least for those folks, hit-or-miss candids probably aren't going to be enough. Finally--and this may be the most difficult part--if you do decide to have all of your posed portraits before the ceremony, it will involve a solid commitment to having everyone there and ready for pictures 90 minutes to 2 hours before the ceremony. Remember, we'll be photographing the traditional pre-ceremony groupings, including the bride with everyone important to her and the groom
portant to him. Then there will be some of these same groupings with both the bride and groom, in addition to poses with the entire wedding party. If everyone you want in the portraits isn't persuaded of the importance of being ready on time, the entire scenario can be in jeopardy. Portraits that are missed because certain people weren't in place may have to be done later--in a less desirable reception site setting--if they're not given up on altogether. No matter whether you decide to do your formal "altar return" portraits before or after the ceremony, it is of critical importance to the flow of your day that your photographer is a qualified professional, with plenty of experience handling the posed portrait session, as well as wedding day "surprises".
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