Children: Making Your Special Day More Special
One of my most favorite wedding photographs of all time happens to be one I took of a bride dancing with two little girls. All three of their faces were lit up with the happiest smiles and I thought the image captured the pure delight the little girls were experiencing at that very moment. The picture has a special significance to me because the bride was a family friend and the two little girls happened to be my own daughters. They talked about that wedding for weeks and the fact the bride took a few minutes to dance with them was one of the things that made that day so very memorable.
There are so many ways to make the children who attend your wedding feel special, even if they're not the ones who get to scatter petals or carry a ring pillow.
Most times, kids feel special when activities are planned just for them. And silly as it may sound, the "one size fits all" activity I see most always involves crayons! Some brides set
up a "coloring station" and that seems to do the trick. But I think
the most clever idea I've seen came from a bride who drew up a
personalized 8 1/2 x 11 coloring sheet and made photocopies
for all the children attending her ceremony. The sheet featured her
name and her groom's, the date, the flowers and theme of her event,
along with a place for the child to put his or her name. Ushers handed
out the sheets and crayons as the children came in and informed them
they should do the best coloring job possible because the completed
sheets were going to be a gift to the newlyweds. After the ceremony,
the bride collected the coloring sheets as each child came through the
receiving line. Each one left with the feeling they had made a
personal contribution to a most important event! One of the most practical ways to make the youngsters feel special is to take them into consideration when you're planning the meal. After all, wouldn't most kids much rather have a hot dog, chicken nuggets or a plate of macaroni and cheese than prime rib, shrimp cocktail or chicken Marsala? Ask your caterer how you can include "kids foods" at your reception and you might find that's a little easier on your wallet as well!
Along that same line, why not designate a special dinner table for the kids (those that are old enough to feed themselves, anyway)? A whimsical centerpiece that doesn't clash with the rest of your decor would be a fun way to make the table even more special and you could set out a colorful, personalized place marker for each child. Consider favors that are different from the ones you planned for the adults--candy twists (right) instead of candied almonds, for example. Or how about clear plastic bags of jelly beans in your wedding colors. Tie a name tag on the bags and the favors double as fun "child friendly" place markers. And
here's another place where the idea of coloring comes in handy--if the
children are young, ask the caterer to cover their table with butcher
paper, use crayons to write the children's names at their places and leave the crayons on the table for the kids to enjoy. Asking one or two
of the older children (well in advance of the wedding) to serve as the
children's table "host" or "hostess" will help keep the table better
supervised and send the "host" or "hostess" home feeling even more
special themselves!If your budget allows, there are a number of other good ways to help the kids really enjoy your wedding (and allow their parents the same opportunity!) Consider hiring an on-location sitter--not to simply "watch" the kids, but to supervise activities and games. The "kids area" can be as simple as a table or two off to one side of the reception hall or a separate room down the corridor. The latter would allow your sitter to show videos or plan noisier games. However, if you do send the kids down the hall, make sure someone goes down to get them for "must see" events like the cake cutting and the bouquet toss. Your young guests won't feel so very special if they miss those big moments!
If you decide not to use a sitter, you still might want to hire a magician, story teller or balloon artist to keep the kids entertained for short periods of time.
Another fun idea for making the kids feel special involves calling them up for a "toy toss." This is usually held just before or after the tossing of the bouqu
et and garter, although some brides do this instead. The toys are usually
tiny, soft (squishy) animals and you can even get them personalized.
Some brides choose to toss just one, but if you want to avoid sending
children home disappointed, you can order enough for every child who'll be attending and toss them all at once. 
Kids love a photo booth! If you're planning to have one, make sure you appoint a responsible adult to see to it every child gets the special treatment of a session in the photo booth. Even if you don't have a photo booth, don't underestimate how important kids feel when they have their picture taken. Spend a few minutes posing for a photo with each child and you'll have a special "portrait" to tuck into the Thank You note you'll be
sending to their family (if your note also mentions the child by name,
think of the lasting impression you'll be making!)Of course, making your wedding special for the children doesn't have to cost money. If you plan to make remarks to your reception guests, why not recognize special children by name? This would be particularly easy to do, if the children are seated at their own table. I remember one bride who really made an impression when she introduced all of the children from the Sunday School class she teaches!
You could ask your DJ about some of the special dances and activities he's used to entertain children--perhaps something as simple as asking them to come up front to lead the adults in "The Chicken Dance" or playing a "kids only" dance tune by a hot young artist (think Hannah Montana). This simple gesture would also be entertaining for the adults in the group!
And here's a nice idea that doesn't cost a penny--have each of the children who attends your wedding sign the guest book personally. Even
though most parents include their children when they sign the book, the kids will really feel special if you ask them to write their names themselves. If you've hired a sitter for the evening, that person could be in charge of this activity. Otherwise, ask a bridesmaid, groomsman or another adult who likes kids, to lend a hand. Better yet, if you have the time, carry the guest book around yourself. And if the children at your wedding are particularly important to you, you might do what one bride I know did--she made a special little guest book just for the kids and had her photograph taken with each one, so that she could later attach a picture next to each name. Even though children can really inject some life into the party, I've seen them treated like an afterthought at too many weddings. By taking a few minutes to give each child a little attention, whether it's a dance, a hug or a quick smile for the camera, you can make that child feel special -- and make your wedding even more memorable for everyone.
For more ideas and beautiful wedding images, check out my website http://www.dougforner.com
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